I heard a whispered instruction of “Embrace.”
A direction for 2020. Not a suggestion but a command. I took it and applied it. I prepared for the turning of the calendar page with personal and business goals. I created a schedule, put due dates down on paper, and worked out challenges to productivity with my husband.
I stepped up to the New Year ready to embrace it with fervor. The known of 2019 moved aside for the possibilities of 2020, and I sprinted forward.
And then I stumbled.
Not because I of anything I did; the ground rose and fell underneath me with various life disruptions, making my footing so unsure that I found myself frantically trying to regain my balance as I advanced one week into the next.
And just as soon as I thought I had righted myself, the ground dropped out from under me with a sudden and intense finality.
You know that sick feeling you get in your stomach just as you realize this is not what should be and you know you are standing on the edge of something intensely wrong?
Loss. So much loss was ushered in with the month of March.
Getting My Feet Under Me
I want to call April a month of healing, but that would be misplaced. Instead, it has become what I believe God always intended for me this year: an embrace.
An embrace from my Creator.
An embrace of my unique design.
I wrote before of sitting in the tension of my personal need to move into a new normal and my personal desire to delay a goodbye to the future I thought lay before me in 2020. That tension still exists, and I expect it to for a bit, but I am choosing to surrender my instinct to run from it and, instead, to embrace it.
I know I’m not the only one sitting in this tension; March 2020 ushered in loss for everyone on a global scale. Loss of rhythms, loss of routine, loss of accomplishments, loss of income, loss of expectations, loss of loved ones…
As a collective whole, we are living in the tension of moving forward with each day, living a new 2020, and of grieving the loss of our desired 2020.
We can run from the tension. Or, we can embrace it.
Embrace Your 2020
At the beginning of the year, in my attempt to plan and be productive, I created a list of 20 Things to Try in 2020. I was really excited about this list. I wanted to do new things this year, things that I thought might push me out of my comfort zone.
I don’t know about you, but I’m as far out of my comfort zone right now as I want to be.
A whispered instruction to embrace.
In embracing the tension, I can’t ignore my unique design. I do better with a plan. However, there is no plan for navigating a global pandemic and there is no plan for walking through grief. But, there is a plan for living in faith.
I was instructed at the beginning of this year to embrace. In faith, that’s what I’m going to do.
I rewrote the list this week (even made it quarantine friendly) with this idea of “embracing” at the center. I chose categories that I thought highlighted the idea of embracing: Spiritual (embracing God), Social (embracing others), and Intellect and Physical (embracing your unique design). I marked my calendar to do one a week, starting this week.
It’s nothing earth-shattering; the goal is to simply embrace trying one thing each week.
I think there is a grace-filled welcome in the simplicity of it.
A grace-filled welcome to take one step forward each week on this new 2020 ground we’re walking. The pathway may not become clearer with each step, but it’ll be there underfoot.
And if it’s not? I know the one who embraces me when the ground drops out from underneath me will continue to be faithful, as He always has.
Embrace Your 2020
If you find yourself in a place where you want to focus on embracing your 2020 week by week, I want to invite you to join me in trying these 20 activities.
Here’s how it will work:
- Sign up using the form below and I’ll send you two downloads: 20 Things to Try in 2020 and 20 Verses to Memorize in 2020.
- On Mondays, I’ll send you an email with the Bible verse I’m memorizing for the week (you can memorize or meditate on the verse, it’s your choice) and the activity I plan to do. I’ll try to include any resources I find helpful!
- On my socials (Instagram & Facebook) I will post my progress using #embraceyour2020. Make sure you do too so we can cheer each other on!
That’s it. Like I said, keeping it simple here. Come join me.