About the Episode
My guest today, Angie Gibbons, gets the importance of rest– she’s created an app designed to help you put a rhythm of rest and connection with God into your every day– which is why I was so excited to sit down with her and discuss what Sabbath looks like in her life. I was blown away by the sincerity, sage advice, and beauty of what Angie had to share with us. We talked about what it means to Sabbath as a mom of littles, a mom of teens, a homeschooling mom, and a work-from-home mom. We also touched on the subject of burn-out, communicating your rest needs to your spouse, reclaiming our whole selves, and resisting the shame of mom guilt. It’s a conversation packed with truth and vulnerability and I hope you listen in.
About My Guest
Angie is a writer, speaker, and co-founder of Dawn, a mindful faith company. Her passion is to empower women to pursue spiritual and mental wholeness. Angie lives and surfs in Hawaii with her husband and three daughters.
Click for Transcript
Rachel: [00:00:00] You’re listening to episode 23 of the Simply Sabbath podcast.
Rest doesn’t have to be a four-letter word. If you feel like you’re about to break from exhaustion. Let me invite you to Simply Sabbath, a podcast for the burnt-out Christian mom, who longs to get back to the core of who she is and to reclaim the deep joy and stabilizing peace Jesus has for her in her every day– without the mom guilt that often accompanies self-care practices.
Hi, my name is Rachel Fahrenbach and I help busy moms just like you add a simple restful family Sabbath to their week. So they can experience a refueling that gives them exactly what they need to live the life that God has called them to. I’m so glad you’ve joined me today. Let’s get to it.
I often say in in this space, that practicing [00:01:00] Sabbath brings the stabilizing piece with it because it brings peaceful rhythms into our weeks that point us back to God’s comfort and provision. That’s why I’m excited to have a conversation today about Sabbath with my friend, Angie Gibbons. Angie is a writer, speaker and co-founder of Dawn an interactive devotional that incorporates affirmation, gratitude, releasing worries, scripture, guided prayer, and journaling into a 10 minute daily practice all in the convenience of an app. I love the fact that there’s an app that can bring even more peaceful rhythms into our week. Her passion is to empower women to pursue spiritual and mental wholeness. Angie lives and surfs in Hawaii– I’m jealous– with her husband and her three daughters. Thanks for joining me today, Angie.
Angie: Thank you so much for having me.
Rachel: Now, Angie, before we get into the topic of Sabbath, do you mind sharing a little bit more about yourself? What you do, um, kind of what your passion like we were talking [00:02:00] about, you’re passionate to empower women, why don’t you share a little bit more about that?
Angie: Sure I’d be happy to. Well, I started, um, I studied writing as a, as a career. Um, and once I had my family, I felt like I was like, you need to homeschool. And I was very focused in, on that for a while. And God kind of drew me back into writing. Um, through some challenges we were having as a family, uh, with one of our children and special needs that she has and, and writing became a real outlet for me.
And, um, as we often do, I thought, okay, I know what I’m supposed to do. I know it, I know what God wants me to do here. Um, but the more that I wrote and engaged with women on these topics, the more I recognized that what I was really struggling with more than the specific struggle needs, I was, I was struggling with myself.
I was struggling with, um, my own, uh, my own sense of striving. I was struggling with anxiety just as a person and as a mother [00:03:00] that was just really sabotaging a lot of the good things I was trying to do with my family. And so God really sent me on a journey through all these circumstances through, through writing, through meeting with other women, um, really setting me free from a lot of those things.
And, um, so I’ve just become really passionate about encouraging other women to really not settle, you know, not settle for kind of just getting by in life, not settle for being the angry, the angry parent who frustrated all the time and feels like, gosh, I just can never get it. Right. I, it, all of that. And, and so, um, yeah, it’s been such a blessing to my life.
I would say definitely I am a work in progress, so I try to share really honestly vulnerably from that place, not as a, you know, as an expert. Um, but like, uh, like so many things, you know, when we start sharing and we start digging into God’s word about things, it’s just, you know, we start growing and it’s so fun and so exciting to see that and to see the fruit, uh, in our, in our lives, in our [00:04:00] relationships and all of that.
Yeah. So I just, you know, I’ve been blogging for quite a while. And more recently developed, uh, this app as a tool, um, but do a lot of writing and speaking really around the topics of rest and kind of how rest is connected to having a really rich, meaningful life.
Rachel: Mm. I love that. Now you practice Sabbath, right?
Angie: Mmmhmm. I do.
Rachel: So at what point in that journey of where you’re talking about growing into somebody that you’re writing on these topics, and you’re realizing that these were things you’re struggling at. Where does Sabbath kind of come into play in that journey?
Angie: Yeah, I, um, I never took Sabbath before. You know, it was one of the many things when I was a younger mom, when I was growing up, it was one of the many things that I was like, I think that’s for other people, you know, like I’m just going to ignore that part of the Bible.
Um, and I think that, I thought it was for people. Who wanted to rest, who felt like I imagined had [00:05:00] this imaginary thing in my mind, if somebody like on a chase lounge, you know, luxuriously reading or with tea. And I was like, I’m just not that person. I mean, I love to read, but I’m not a sit around kind of person.
Rachel: I was going to say, are you more of a doer? Like, you like to do things?
Angie: Yeah, I’m more of a doer. I mean, not that I can’t be lazy and stay in my, my PJ’s I can, but I’m still be doing something, you know, I’ll still be like, oh, organize that shelf or I’ll, whatever. It’s really, it’s always been really hard for me to just be still, just rest and, and that’s not. And my experience, not real conducive to having a real strong connection with the Lord.
Not that you can’t have the, on the go. And I would say that’s one thing I do now is incorporate a lot of talking to God while I’m like walking and biking and things like that. Cause that really, it really does help me, but I would say that, um, yeah, always having been a doer and then having young children and homeschooling and [00:06:00] constantly surrounded by people.
I think, I felt like I’d get a pass on this one. You know, I’m doing all of my other church-y stuff. I’m involved in ministry. I get a pass on this Sabbath thing and not surprisingly, it led me to terrible burnout, just terrible fatigue, you know, like I could never get enough rest to ever feel good in the morning.
I would just–
Rachel: what did that burnout look like for you? Were you like just exhausted all the time or did it like manifest in different ways as well?
Angie: I would say I was exhausted all the time. Um, but also I just, my general mood was negative all the time because I was never getting refueled. I was giving and giving and giving and feeling like that was my spiritual act of worship was give– it was giving.
Angie: And certainly I was doing lots of great things, but, but I was not being replenished. I wasn’t asking for the things that I [00:07:00] needed. Um, I wasn’t slowing down enough to even, I would say even like, process the good things that I was learning from the Lord, you know, it kind of just some things just take time and you can’t avoid that.
Right. It takes time, um, to think through things, to meditate on things. Um, and I was very resistant to that and I would say I, I was kind of, I feel like I was kind of forced into it. But the real gift is, I feel like if you give God an inch in this area, he just blesses it so much. You know? It’s like, if you are willing to give him five minutes or like that walk, like I said, go for a walk and just like talk and just talk to the Lord instead of listening to music or whatever it might be.
Um, having a discipline of reading one scripture day. Like if you start with the smallest little thing, As an act of, it’s really an act of sacrifice, um, and an act of worship, but I feel like he takes that and he blesses it and then you’re like, oh, I, I think I’d like [00:08:00] a little more of that. That actually, that actually felt really great.
Rachel: So what does a Sabbath practice look like in your life now? Has it changed?
Angie: Yes, it has definitely changed over time. And I think that that kind of plays into my beliefs about Sabbath, which is that they’re unique to each person they’re unique to each season. Um, I have teenagers now. I have a preteen and two teenagers.
And for years I really kind of. A lot of boundaries around our weekends so that we could have family time or, you know, when I recognized I needed Sabbath so that I could have my Sabbath is like, you know, sorry, nobody’s going anywhere in mom’s car. So I can just, I could just be for a little bit. Um, but now that they’re older, that’s really, it’s changed some and they’re involved in activities that are wonderful, like with church that are on the weekends and I’m driving all over.
Um, and so I feel like in this particular season, Sabbath is like Taking moments that I can take. [00:09:00] Um, and I feel like that’s, I used to have such a, like a narrowly, a narrow definition I should say of Sabbath. And that really crippled me. Like I said, the chase lounge, the tea or whatever, but also I think that, um, like in Hebrews four, when it talks about, it talks about entering into the rest of God and it says that it’s something we have to strive for.
And I think that. That kind of helped open up a new world to me that, um, really what defines rest for me or work for me is unique. Um, and it’s really about kind of what I’m striving for. So for example, like I love hiking. I love being out in creation in the mountains that is it’s work. It is sweaty hot work.
And if I want my kids to come with me, there’s going to be like 10 minutes of negotiating.
Rachel: Yep! And then you have to prepare for it. Yeah. You know, make sure everybody has water bottles, make sure that everybody’s wearing the correct, correct clothing. The right shoes.
Angie: Exactly. Exactly. It’s it’s it’s [00:10:00] work, but like that’s worthy work to me. Like that’s something worth striving for in this season of our lives, because it, it, you know, strengthens those family bonds. It’s quality. It’s really quality time where we’re not on screens and all of that. So I would say. That is a worthy Sabbath time in this season of our lives. It’s something that we could do together, but it’s not, it’s not sitting around, you know?
And so I feel like for me, um, Sabbath is about really separating what fills me and brings me joy. And also what helps me to connect with the Lord and separating that from all of the just busy work, the things that just kind of keep our home running, keep my writing, running, you know, all of those things that really serve me, but don’t, don’t serve me emotionally. Don’t serve my soul as much, um, or in a different way.
Rachel: It’s kind of important to note that, especially when we are moms who [00:11:00] are homeschooling, because I homeschool as well, when we’re in the home constantly. And, um, we can tend to think of homeschooling as our job and, um, or maybe we work from home as well. Some of us, like you and I, we work from home as well as writers. So we have our work. Our homeschooling work as a teacher principal, all the things, superintendent, you know, the whole world, we’re running a school in our homes. And so that is work as well, but then you also have housework and then you have, you know, the work of like mom, right? Like the chauffeur thing that you’re talking about and just like keeping them alive. And so I think it’s really hard sometimes when we wear so many hats and it’s not an easy to define work a nine to five, you leave the house, go to work, and then come home from work, that is even more important for us to set that boundary of rest and say, [00:12:00] these are life-giving things that I need to refill so that I can pour out in these various facets of my life.
And yes, they are all work. And some things can’t be put aside, they’re just responsibilities such as caring for our children’s wellbeing. But when we’re mom and homeschooler and work from home. It’s very hard to find those moments of rest in our every day. And so it becomes even more important I think for women like us to put the Sabbath rhythms into place, whether that’s our daily Sabbath rhythms of connecting with the Lord or a longer period of time where we’re really setting aside time to rest in ways that are unique to our personality and wirings. Um, so I think that’s a really important thing that you brought up there.
Angie: I agree. And I think that’s, we have to take as with anything, take shame off of ourselves about what our [00:13:00] life and our rhythms look like compared to someone else, because I would say if you’re in the season of life where you’re feeding a baby all the time, and you have toddlers running around your Sabbath might be taking a bath instead of a shower and just like indulging for a few extra minutes. And, you know, instead of having time away with your girlfriends or whatever it might look like when your kids are a little older and more independent.
And also that depends so much. If you have a supportive person in your life, a supportive spouse who can help, you know, alleviate some of that burden. But I also think there’s a real trust factor to all of this. Letting go of our work, whatever it is, whether it’s our house being a mess or, um, work that we’re doing, you know, as part of a career, um, it takes real trust in the Lord to let those things go and say like, it’s okay my identity is secure. If my house is dusty, my, you know, my work is going to be okay and work itself out [00:14:00] if I keep it within these boundaries. And that was a big thing for me is growing out of kind of a place of anxiety that I was living in that, that busy-ness was about kind of controlling my environment and, and, and feeling like I had to be the one to do everything. And I feel like the more we press into God’s provision for us, and even just the way that, that he rested in creation, and we look at that and just say, you know, it’s, it’s not really all on me and it really is okay for me to ask for the things that I need. You know, when the people in my life don’t see that I’m burning out, it’s really okay for me to say I just really need this. I need to go, I need to go and do this thing. I need to walk out of this house without any children, you know, holding onto me. I need to go for a long drive, whatever it is. I think that that comes from a place of us recognizing that as God’s beloved daughter, we need that and, and that’s [00:15:00] a good and worthy use of our time.
Rachel: Yeah. And I don’t know about you, but for me, I’ve seen a lot of, I don’t know if memes are the right word for it, or just like video skits or, you know, there’s a lot on the internet right now with the, for motherhood in particular where, it’s almost like, mom suppresses those needs to the point where she just kind of explodes and she’s like, I kind of just get out of this place right here. Like I gotta run away and I’ve had that feeling of, I just want to run away from home and I’ve seen jokes where it’s like, oh, Maybe like, I wouldn’t mind like getting injured. Cause then I could be in the hospital and be away from everybody for a couple of days.
Right. Like there’s like, we all laugh because there’s a little bit of truth in it. But then whenever I laugh, I almost feel a little bit of conviction because it’s like, that should not be it. That should not be how it goes. That is not God’s desire for us to be so burnt out to the point where we want to go hide in a hospital bed. [00:16:00] Right? And, asking for that moment of rest can be really hard and it can be very vulnerable. And it’s admitting that we are not super woman and we can’t do it all. Um, and like you said, it, it, it depends on your spouse, that level of comfortability, you have an asking about those things, but, it is so important to be able to articulate that you have a need to rest, but it’s also one of the reasons why I suggest having a family Sabbath because having that regular rhythm in which you build into a time where mom gets to rest in whatever way she needs to. And it’s just an expectation now that every week we do this and every week mom gets this moment to an hour to herself. And it’s not, there’s no guilt in that because we all know that this is what we’re doing this week. It is what we all expect from the weekend or from whatever day we choose to do our Sabbath on.
I wonder if you have any suggestions for [00:17:00] how to go about engaging in that conversation with your spouse or whoever else might be a support role in your life to ask for those moments of rest.
Angie: Yeah. Oh, that’s such a good question. Um, and I love what you’re saying about, about making it routine for everyone.
I think that this is maybe a really unsatisfying answer. I think it depends, like you said, on your situation and your spouse and how open and willing they are. And I feel like if you have a spouse who is already kind of carrying some of the load of, of home and all of that, it’s a little easier to say, Hey, can we make this a regular thing that you take the kids to do this particular activity? And I’m going to go do such and such, you know, I’m, I’m intentionally not going to be at home, doing dishes. I’m going to go and do whatever. I think that if you don’t have that, I would say first I would pray. I would really pray and the Lord knows what you need. [00:18:00] And I, I believe he has the path forward for you.
That is not filled with that exhaustion and anxiety, no matter what your situation is, whether you’re working full time and you’re raising kids and all of that, I feel like he has a way forward. And so I would pray and ask him, Lord, would you give me, would you give me the words and also the opportunity, because we know these kind of conversations they can come at better times and worse, worse times.
But I think sometimes it helps just to kind of negotiate, you know, like my husband surfs all the time. I love that for him. It’s such a good outlet, but it’s an, it’s a thing, right? You gotta get your board out there. You’re out there for you. You have no watch. You’re just one with nature for however long. And he comes back so refreshed and sometimes I’m there at the stove and I’m like, you know, and I have to like stop myself. And, but those are, those are moments where I feel a little bit of something creeping up inside of me that I say, oh, What he’s doing, isn’t wrong. It means I’m not, I’m not taking what I need for myself.[00:19:00]
And because he’s working outside of the house, he does forget sometimes how much work is happening inside the house. And so that’s a, that’s a cue for me not to resent him, but to say, Hey, you know what I would really love to do. I would love to do these things at this time. And usually he’s very agreeable. And, you know, and if, if I have to, I could say, you know, you’ve been surfing this many hours. I’m so happy for you to do that. I would love to do this. So I think, again, it depends on your situation and it’s and finding the right timing. But I just, I feel like there is a defined rhythm. And you talked about that. It being something that you practice regularly and when everybody gets into that groove and then they see that mom is like more fun to be around because she’s rested and she’s not like snapping at everybody. I think that they’ll get on board. I really do.
Rachel: Yes. I agree. I love what you said about noticing when that creeps up inside of us. He’s not doing anything wrong. I’m [00:20:00] the one who’s not doing the thing I need to do. I think that’s so profound because I think it’s really easy for us to blame our spouse sometimes when we’re feeling the stress of everything to just be like, well, you’re just going off and surfing or you’re going off and doing the thing and you’re not helping me out. You’re not recognizing that I need this to. And really they’re not a mind reader. They have no idea what we’re internally… Like, because for most, probably for the most part we can handle a lot. Most of us can handle and we do carry a lot. We probably don’t show how much it’s really affecting us. And so they can’t tell they can’t recognize it. And so we have to verbalize it for them. It’s not fair of us to expect them to recognize what’s happening internally inside of us. So you need to give that to them. I just think that’s so profound and so good.
Angie: Yeah. I, I think that another way [00:21:00] of looking at it too, one of my friends said this, um, a little while ago, it’s really stuck with me is that she was saying, you know, as moms, we’re not going to achieve a perfect balance, we’re just going to constantly be balancing and rebalancing.
And I think that is so true. You kind of feel like I found a routine that works and this kid does this program on this day and my husband does this and I do. And then it all shifts, you know, that kid doesn’t do that anymore. And husband is working a weird schedule and, oh my gosh. And, and we just have to go, okay, what is my new balance for the season?
What is my new routine that works? And it can take a little bit to figure it out. I think if we can know that that’s normal and give ourselves grace for that, it helps. It helps tremendously to not think that we should just be able to like, boom, immediately, you know, be in a good rhythm and, and, and be at rest. It is something that we have to kind of work, work toward and that’s okay.
Because that is really, it’s really worthy work for us.
Rachel: So [00:22:00] practicing Sabbath, do you do that on a weekly basis or is it just as needed?
Angie: I do it on a weekly basis. I do carve out some time every Sunday. Um, in our home, we don’t do anything digital that we can help other than, you know, calling grandparents or things like that on Sunday. So that, that really helps in and of itself.
Um, and I do try to take just some downtime. To rest and just pay attention to my body. Like, I will take a long nap, you know, which I’m not usually a napper, but I’ll really just try to pay attention to what, what am I needing? Um, but I would say I do try to incorporate into my whole week things that feel like Sabbath to me, little things that bring me joy.
And so one of those for me is just going for a walk in the mornings. It really helps just my, I think it helps my brain chemistry. Um, it helps me to wake up. It helps me to kind of connect with God and nature. So I do little things like that. That just feel like a small gift to me, [00:23:00] um, that are really not about anybody else.
Um, but they can be short. It literally could be 10 minutes. I’m about to have to start school with the kids and I’m like, I gotta go. Do your stuff I’ll be back, you know, so it’s, it’s little things, but it’s just little acts of giving to myself and ways I can connect with God where there aren’t people around. Um, that yeah, just, I feel it kind of keeps me going throughout the week, so I don’t hit Sunday and I’m like dead.
Rachel: Right. I think I’ve heard it said that Sabbath isn’t just about resting. It’s about how you spend the other six days of the week as well. And so I like what you’re saying about how you make little moments throughout your week that feel like Sabbath and remind you of that bigger rest and remind you to, to reconnect with God on a daily basis. I really, I really liked that. What, um, I know you had mentioned that as you started practicing Sabbath, you notice you were not snapping at people as much, and you kind of became a little bit more of a fun person to be around. Are there any other ways in which practicing Sabbath [00:24:00] changed your life?
Angie: Yeah, I mean, I would say that’s the biggest one that you just mentioned. I feel like I kinda got myself back. I mean, that sounds like so cliche, but it’s really true. I feel like there were a number of years I kind of lost myself to my work as a mother. And, um, I kinda lost my own joy. I was so busy trying to help my kids find joy, happiness, and meet everybody’s needs.
And, you know, especially having a kid with special needs, it just can like really consume all of your energy trying to keep them going forward and trying to keep the whole family, you know, like operational. And so doing things that were really nourishing to me, I feel like I just remembered what it was like to, to feel joy again and not just contentment, you know, I’m, I’m a good Christian, I mean, I’m content, you know, but really actually just having fun again. And [00:25:00] it, it brought back fun with my kids. We started dancing in the living room more and just doing goofy stuff. And, um, so I felt like it actually really reconnected me to my family. Um, and, and not just if there’s a real overflow to that, right. My husband and I were enjoying each other more. We started spending more time intentionally together, especially as our kids got a little older than that got a little, I mean, it just gets a little easier in a certain season of life. Um, those were the biggest changes, but I would say on a daily basis, I just feel more grounded and more connected to God than I used to. Um, I think that I used to think of my relationship with God more in like a checklist. You know, these are the things, cause I’m kinda type a, so like these are the things I’m supposed to do.
And I would even tell myself, you know, it’s okay if you don’t feel it, because you’re just, it’s a discipline. You’re supposed to do it, but I just… God has more for us than that. And so I feel like now, even when I go for my walks, like I gave talking about, that’s just a big thing for me. [00:26:00] I might go for my walks and feel more connected to God in that 10 minute space, because I’m really talking to him and trying to hear from him, then I would reading a chapter in the Bible. Both worthy activities, but it’s really a matter of, kind of my heart and that I am not checking that list off, but I’m saying like, okay, God, I really want you to be Lord over this day.
And I really want to give you all of these really hard things that I’m dealing with that are so heavy for me. So it’s, it’s more of a genuine, relational kind of connection versus just doing spiritual things that I think, make me look good on paper.
Rachel: I’ve been there.
Angie: It’s easy to slip into that. Right? We’re so busy and you are trying to do the right things. It’s not coming from a bad place or bad motive. There’s nothing wrong with that. There are those seasons where we’re like, I just have to be disciplined. I don’t feel anything. I’ve got to be disciplined. But my encouragement would be like to not stay there and to figure [00:27:00] out what it is in this season that will help you connect to God. For my husband, it’s listening to podcasts, he listens to sermons and different speakers and things. When he’s driving to and from work, that’s a dedicated time that he really learns and he grows and he connects with God.
And that’s not my thing, but it really. It really does something for him and he’ll come home super like charged up about something. And so I think it’s, it’s like be willing to experiment for this season of what it is that really refuels you and helps you to feel that, that closeness to God.
Rachel: Be willing to experiment. I think that’s a good word of advice right there. I know that you have mentioned that you’ve struggled with anxiety throughout your life. Did you find that Sabbath helped you in any way with your anxiety?
Angie: Absolutely. I, um, I would not say at all that I have like a traditional meditation practice. Like what people imagine that looks like that would be terrible for me, like sitting for long periods [00:28:00] of time. I’m not trying to break any records. I’ve tried that, you know, but I would say that incorporating. A little bit of quiet in my day has been really fundamental for me because anxiety is always telling you that you need to go faster and you need to do more. You need to stay on top of everything. And the act of like coming up against that and saying no to that, kind of rebelling against that natural feeling is so, has been so healthy for me. So sometimes it’s like in the morning I might stretch on my mat and then I take literally a minute or two minutes to sit and take really deep breaths.
I might pray, I might have some little affirmation that I say, I mean, we’re talking short periods of time. But, like I said earlier, it’s amazing how doing something small like that, and just kind of reclaiming a little bit of space in your brain and saying like, no, I don’t have to [00:29:00] just operate out of, however, my brain is telling me this morning I have to operate.
I don’t have to let this feeling of urgency. Um, kind of take control that just it it’ll start kind of playing out through the rest of your day, where then you’re like rushing to get everybody into the car and you’re operating out of the anxiety. Well, wait a minute. Right? I can still get everybody in the car, but I don’t have to be anxious about it. I don’t have to like push these people when snap at them. And really, as my kids got older, I started seeing them doing the things that I had been doing all their lives, you know, those anxious kind of behaviors and —
Rachel: because they’re sponges.
Angie: Yes. And then I was like, whoa, whoa, oh no. Oh no. It really helped me to see myself and to go wait, we can do these things. We can even be busy, but not operate out that space. So for me, just taking a little bit of meditation and it could be like a simple as having a verse of the day. And repeating it to yourself. [00:30:00] Um, doing some deep breathing, it doesn’t have to be something super long or spiritual, but that has really helped me a lot with just breaking that cycle of that you kind of get trapped in. I feel like with anxiety.
Rachel: I think the Bible talks a lot about remembering. Remember your creator. Remember your, your provider. Remember, you know, your God. And I think that what you’re talking about is very similar to that. It’s like every morning you’re remembering who’s you are, and that you’re operating on his timeline. You don’t have to let that anxiety, you know, that worry that you’re not doing enough or being enough because you are already in the hands of the one who loves you and created you and has things planned for your life and is taking care of you. Have you faced any challenges in practicing Sabbath?
Angie: Um, I would say the biggest challenge has been kind of what I mentioned earlier, a feeling like I’ve like fallen off the wagon and I can’t get back on it. Um, and so, [00:31:00] yeah, I think just learning to be flexible with it and to not stress. I’m just naturally a more routine person, I function better in routine. So just as, you know, for example, if my husband is off on a random day in the week and he’s like, let’s go do this. He’s a real outdoor adventure person and we live in Hawaii. So he’s like, let’s go kayak. It’s a perfect day. And everything in me is like, oh no, like a schedule, you know? And I mean, literally a schedule could be like the most mundane things that can easily be moved, but there’s something in me that kind of fight s a change. And so I think that the more, I practice being flexible and going outside and just going like, no, I need to take advantage of this. Like you never regret doing that. Right. You might regret it. Um, and the same would be true for, you know, if, um, somebody is available a girlfriend’s available to hang out and it’s going to be a little more difficult for my family, right? They might be eating chicken nuggets because I’m going to go [00:32:00] out with this girlfriend. And I had to accept, like, that was actually a really good trade for my kids. Like, I don’t want them eating chicken nuggets, but Hey, if I come back feeling like I’ve gotten to connect with a friend and I’ve gotten to share my, my heart for a little bit, I’m going to be a much better mom when I come back.
And so that, that was a good choice to make. But yeah, I think just being willing to kind of go with the flow a little bit more than it then comes naturally to me has been super helpful.
Rachel: I could talk to you for so long about the concept of not having that mom guilt. How about doing things, activities, taking those moments where you step away from your children because I, I know there’s so many of us that struggle with that. Struggle with being okay. You know, like I even know, I know mentally that it’s good for me to like go away and write for a couple hours sometimes. Like I do a lot of work from home, but [00:33:00] sometimes getting out of the house and being in a different space where there’s not the subconscious worry of the house behind me is a good thing for me. But even then I feel guilty about leaving and I shouldn’t. And that has been a really hard thing for me to work on every time I do it. I think what you’re saying is so true. It’s like, we need to take those moments and recognize that for some of us, especially those who are more extroverted than others, that having moments where we are connecting with friends and connecting with other adults and having an adult conversation, that’s important as a mom, that is a good thing for our kids. It trickles down and it is okay. We are not going neglecting our children. We are not harming our kids by taking some time. We are not loving them any less by stepping outside of our home and doing something that’s just focused on us for a little bit.
Angie: Yeah, that’s so true. One of the things that helped [00:34:00] me with that thinking was to recognize that this is not the life that I wanted for my daughters. I didn’t want to raise them to live a life that is only service and where there’s not any joy in it. Where it’s all work. That’s not what I would want for them. So why would I give that to myself or, or model that for them? And the reality is children are naturally selfish creatures. They want what they want when they want it. It’s all about them. So they are going to give you grief about it. They are there. And, you know, and if you’re a naturally really compassionate person, it’s going to be even harder to do Sabbath, because they’re all going to be like, Mom, I thought we were going to read together, they’ll pull out their saddest face and they’re never do this with me or whatever. And you kind of just have to be like, la la la la. I know that’s not true. I got to just run, run out the door. You know, just like don’t look back because that’s just naturally, they’re going to want to pull on you. And that’s, that’s exactly why we get so exhausted is because of that [00:35:00] emotional load of being a mother. It’s not just the tasks that we do. It is the constantly thinking about how we’re caring for these kids and how we’re preparing them for life. Like we, you know, we just carry these huge weights about that, about their future. And it’s like, yeah, sometimes you just gotta go outside of your home and just be you know, Angie and Rachel, and just be like that person that you were, that you still are, that’s just that, you know, has your own, your own desires and interests. And all of that, you know.
Rachel: I have a friend who she was talking about. Enjoy doing something fun that she enjoys. And some people being surprised that that was something that she enjoys and it’s fun. Her husband was just saying, well, um, These people that haven’t known you pre kids, they’ve only known you since you’ve had kids. And yeah, you haven’t done this very often because the kids are little, but now that they’re a little bit older, you can return [00:36:00] to doing that. He’s like, so that’s probably why it’s surprising to them because they’ve never seen the side of you. And so we were just talking about how that can be. That is interesting to think about how the things that we lay aside, especially when our kids are little that are true to who we are and the things that we like to do. And the moment we get to pick those back up again, it feels like we are returning to our whole selves. It does feel like we’re returning to, like you had mentioned earlier, like finding yourself again. And I, I think I really want to emphasize for moms of little, like, yes, your season of life can be really difficult. But don’t let it get in the way of you doing those things that you love and enjoy. If you can, you know, take, take an hour and go do the thing that you enjoy doing. God is not asking you to put, you know, aside yourself, like your personality, the way that he created you to be for eight years. And then you get to pick it back up again. That’s [00:37:00] not anywhere in the Bible, not anything that you are being asked to do. So I liked what you said earlier about taking time to pray, because there is a way that God has forward for you. Um, and I would just encourage any mom that’s listening, who has littles right now. Don’t, don’t feel like you have to wait. Start implementing this practice of Sabbath, talk to your spouse, figure out a time that you can get to do the things that make you, you, and that make you come alive. And are filling, you know, and are things that fill you up. Angie, would you have any tips or suggestions about practicing Sabbath for any of the moms that are listening?
Angie: Yeah, I would just say to see it as a gift to yourself, you know, when we start seeing it as a religious activity, it kind of becomes like another thing on our list that we don’t want to do. But, um, whatever it [00:38:00] looks like for you in this season of life, I would say, just see this as a way of giving back to yourself. And obviously the more that we connect with God. The more he fills us and he fills parts of us and needs that we have that we’re not even fully aware of. And I just think there’s something spiritual that happens there that we can’t even define. Right? That even a night out with friends would never fill. So I would say, you know, find that little stretch of time, whatever it is. But find that thing that makes you feel closer to God, because I feel like that will start to kind of open everything up for you and, and make your life feel richer and fuller. And then the other things will, will fall into place for you.
Rachel: Oh, well, I have enjoyed talking with you Angie. And before we go, I want you to make sure you tell people exactly where they can find your app, where they can connect with you. Um, and all the things.
Angie: Sounds good. Thank you so much, [00:39:00] Rachel. Now. So I write at just my name, angiegibbons.com and, um, the app is you can find it at our website, which is gatheratdawn.com.
You can get to it from my website as well, but that’s kind of the easiest place to really learn about it. What the features are. So the app is free to download. It’s free to install. And we have this interactive daily devotional that I use daily. It takes about 10 minutes. And the whole idea is really, it’s kind of related to what we’re talking about.
It just gives you a simple way to feel like you’ve had a connection time with God each day. And of course, for some people it’s just complimentary to all the other things that they do. But I feel like in a busy season of life, sometimes you’re like, I know I want to do something. I just don’t know where to start. I’ve got this giant pile of books, I’ve got my Bible and I’m just like, I feel kind of lost. It just gives you a really simple thing that you can do each day, um, that it gives you a space to [00:40:00] pray. And to hear what God’s saying to you through scripture, to practice your gratitude to have a little bit of time of, of meditation.
So we just try to make it really simple for you and try to kind of redeem, redeem some time on technology through that. So, yeah, I would love for you to just try it out. We do have some premium features that we that are paid on the app. Like we have audio features and things like that to help support the app and keep it going. Um, but that devotional is a free, um, feature. So yeah, gatheratdawn.com.
Rachel: That sounds fabulous. I can’t wait to check it out and dive into it. I’m really excited about it. Before we close our time together, I would love it if we could, um, take some time in prayer for our listeners and for, um, for all of us really, as we practice Sabbath each week, would you mind leading us in that?
Angie: Yes, I’d be happy to. Father God, we just thank you that you are [00:41:00] in all. And through all that, wherever we are in life, that you are there with us guiding us. And you really see us. You see us as women, you see us as spouses, as mothers and you know, the deepest needs and desires of our hearts. I thank you, that you are available and accessible to us. Um, and so rich and abundant in your love and your grace. So I just pray Lord that we would be able today to just open up a little bit more to that and receive a little more of what you have for us. I know that we just can’t even really comprehend how much you love us. And so I pray father today that we would be able to connect a little bit more deeply with you.
I thank you for each woman, woman represented, father and their families, and it just speak blessing. Um, and it just speak hope over them that whatever season they’re in, whatever hard things they’re facing, um, that you do have a way through. Um, and [00:42:00] you do have peace and rest for them, even in the midst of, of trials and tribulations that, um, you have a way to walk through it with us and hold our hands.
So I pray that you would just make that real and alive for each person listening in. Jesus name. Amen.
Rachel: That was beautiful. Thank you so much for coming in and talking with us today and remind us of that god has a way for us that it’s one of peace and rest. So I really appreciate you coming on here.
And thank you for listening into today’s episode. Let’s plan to meet back here next week and continue our conversation on Sabbath rest and what it could look like in your life each week. Bye.
Hey, I just want to say thank you for joining me for today’s conversation. I know many things demand your attention. I don’t take lightly the privilege it is to share your time. I want to make things as easy and simple for you. So I’ve linked to all the resources mentioned in the episode in the show notes, and you can always find the link and more helpful [00:43:00] information on my website, www.rachelfahrenbach.com.
As we say our goodbyes, let me remind you that what we’re talking about in this podcast is not just another thing to add to your to-do list. This is not another expectation for you to live up to. It is a gift out stretched from the hand of your creator. An invitation to press pause on walking alongside Jesus in all the things He’s called you to do. And instead the down, across from Him and just be with Him.
It is an invitation to Simply Sabbath.
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Hey! I'm Rachel and I'm so glad you're here today!
I help busy moms add a simple, rest-filled family Sabbath to their week. If that sounds like something you want for your week, but don’t know where to start, grab this free how-to resource: The Busy Mom’s Guide to a Simple Family Sabbath.